Tuesday, January 7, 2014

I'm Sorry, This is A Long Post


I’ve really been thinking about my future as of lately, it has to be the main source as to why I’m stressed out 98.7 percent of the time. Back in high school I took the general courses everyone else did, Math, English, History etc. but had an emphasis in medical studies (enticing way to disguise the word ‘nursing’). It was definitely an experience spending clinical hours at a nursing home but I knew it wasn’t what I wanted to do… help people directly, in person. 


Initially I thought I went into this technical high school because I wanted to become some sort of plastic surgeon and live my life like Nip/Tuck or Dr. 90210 (I’m not kidding). Then after a while I thought I decided to stay because it would be a good foundation for my future, in which I would acquire lots of money. Now I’m here, remembering this life lesson one of my teachers told my sophomore year class, it went along the lines of “don’t be in the medical field unless you sincerely and truly care about the welfare of others, don’t do it for the money because its not about the money”.  Being 15 at the time all I thought of was money; it’s even what my parents had taught me, MONEEEEYYYYYY.


Fast forward to where I am now, majoring in biology for no apparent reason other than it was an obvious path for me, I am completely miserable. Let me tell you that It is not because I don’t like biology, I don’t think I’ve given it a chance yet, Its that there’s a big chance that I’m not going to love it. My parents had good intentions keeping my mindset on reaching a lifestyle but now I’m stuck as to how to get there, happily. 


Growing up, every time a teacher told me ‘do what you love, and the money will follow’ I knew it was a lie, but now I’m not sure I care as much. I actually want nothing more than to love my profession. The path I’m taking now doesn’t make any sense as to what I believed in before because biologists don’t make shit, unless of course I decide to become a doctor, which I know will not happen. I can only hope that I will fall in love with something along the way because I never had the chance to figure it out before. I have a few interests but none I feel that I could aspire to become

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